With brave wings she flies: Kirsty's story
Leave him! Why is this advice difficult to follow?
You are so vulnerable. I think deep down you know but the fear takes over. He has already threatened if you leave what he will do. With children it’s even harder. Who will believe you ( if you are even aware its abuse). You have been so mentally and emotionally drained that any fight you have left is used just to get through the day. The thought of having to find somewhere to live, finance, especially if you’ve had no control over these for so long, is so daunting. Then there’s the fear. What if he finds me? What if he forces me back? Will it be worse?. What if he just lets me go? I’ll then be on my own and how will I handle that? It is all very terrifying and so much different to breaking up with someone in a non abusive relationship.
What was the moment that you decided to leave? When I saw my children petrified in one bed and scared for me.
Who helped you to leave? A group of beautiful ladies who knew the struggles I was facing helped me. Behind my back, and in 24 hours, they had gathered donations for an entire household! They collected donations of money as well. When I finally took the leap, they physically moved me, they furnished my house, they dropped around daily with food, hugs and words of encouragement. Give and Take assisted me also in ensuring I was ok. Offering legal services, financial assistance and checking on me regularly to see if I needed anything.
My children and I are free, we enjoy life, we spend quality time together. Our relationships are stronger than ever as we begin the new phases of high school, teenage years, and life as a family of four again. I have a great job, with great support. I recently received a promotion and the kids and I try to get away on small vacations whenever we can to ensure we recharge together from our busy lives. Our lives are filled with seeing friends, endless sports for the boys and quiet nights in watching our favourite tv shows. We are happy, and we are free.